How to Cut With Scissors

BEFORE

"Look mom, I'm giving him a haircut!"

AFTER
Pitiful little puff ball.

The Good, The Bad and the Ugly

Beano, age 6 weeks

Do your kids ever throw fits in public?

Do they ever run out in the parking lot behind an SUV that is pulling out only to have a perfect stranger yell at said SUV driver to make him stop, therefore saving the life of your child?

Do they stay awake at night thinking of other ways to annoy or embarrass you in public?

Oh, good, mine either.

Well, almost never.

Except once last week.

And again today.

Last week Beano almost died. I did not even see it coming. We were at a field trip with some other home school families in a tiny town in a tiny post office. I had borrowed a stroller from another mom and when we were packing up to leave I walked over to her car to load her stroller. The next thing I know some guy is yelling and an SUV is slamming on his breaks and Beano is running merrily along his way to our car, totally oblivious to the fact that that yell just saved his life. As you can imagine I was a little flustered. I was glad beyond measure for the good hearted fellow who saw the life of my 5 year old in danger and acted accordingly. As I made sure all the kids were in the car I looked at the man square in the eyes and said, "Thank you." I wanted him to see how grateful I was for his kindness. In reply he rolled his eyes at me as he got into his huge truck and very sarcastically said, "Ya, good luck with that" as he slammed the door and quickly pulled out of the parking lot, leaving me staring in shock and confusion as to what had just taken place.

He had saved my child's life.

I was grateful, yes.

But in the same moment I was so hurt.

In his ever so brief come back I felt the judgement of the world that said,

"You have too many kids for your own good"

"Hey lady, why don't you watch your kid!"

"What kind of mother are you, anyway?"

"Why aren't those kids in school, where they belong?"

As I drove home my mind raced. I imagined what would have happened if that man had not been there. I imagined the tortuous guilt I would have felt my whole life if the worst had actually happened. I lamented over what that man thought of me. In that moment I felt totally inadequate.

I cried a lot.

I don't think I have ever felt so humiliated in all of my life, not even the time my slip fell down around my ankles in Sacrament Meeting.

And now on to today.

I went grocery shopping with all 4 kids.

I know, I know, that is just trouble waiting to happen. Actually, they are usually really good shoppers. The problem today was that it took way too much time and by the time we were done it was dinner time and everyone was hungry, especially Baby Cakes.

As we stood in the check out line he started to get really irritable.

He was tired and hungry and wanted to go home.

An older woman got in line behind me and talked to Baby Cakes and soothed him. She came up and talked to Beano and Dubs who were just on the verge of their own melt downs. She shared chocolate with them all. She spoke kindly and encouragingly to me.

She did not make me feel bad for having ornery children. She did not roll her eyes and make me feel like a nuisance. She was genuinely kind, her eyes literally sparkled. She probably has no clue how much her kindness helped me. She put my faith back in humanity. Her kindness comforted my heart and helped me to breath a little easier.

This evening I could not help but think of these two events. The reactions of these two strangers was glaringly opposite. One was judgmental and harsh and the other was kind and sincere.

Having been on the receiving end of both in less than a week I have to say I am floored.

Maybe I'm just hormonal, but it has really made me open my eyes and think a little more about the way I treat others. Not only perfect strangers, but my close friends and family as well. If perfect strangers can have those effects on us, then how much more can we have on our little ones.

They feel it when I am harsh and impatient.

They also know and respond when I am kind and gentle.

So to both of those strangers I say, "Thank you for opening my eyes just a little wider!"

Happy Tuesday, everyone! Visit The Lazy Organizer for more Talk about Tuesday.

The Spice of Life

Wouldn't life be boring without kids?

I often wonder what life would be like if, for some strange reason, we did not have our heathens.

I won't lie, there are moments I would trade them all in for a cruise of the Caribbean and the shot at being a normal person with a full time career.

But those moments are few and fleeting.

Those moments are usually right after the kids go tearing through the house like little Tasmanian devils and wake up Baby Cakes from his nap after only 20 minutes of precious sleep. Or when 2 or more of them come to me at one time crying and screaming to me, "So and so hit me!!!"

Or when the 3 year old puts yet another whole roll of toilet paper in the toilet, rendering it totally useless.

Usually once I get my cool back I can look at them and see the cuteness again.

At least 5 time a day I look at Baby Cakes and just laugh at his cuteness. His cute teeth, his cute "da,da,da,da,pthth.", his cute pitter patter steps, the back of his cute little smart head and ears and neck (I love, love, love that part of babies), his cute little pointy finger that's not quite straight, the cute way he laughs whenever he hears anyone flatulate.

Then there are the cute things that the heathens come up with.

Last night we went to a Chinese restaurant to celebrate the Chinese New Year. The waitress came over to take our order and Beano states at the top of his voice, "I want a burrito!"

Whoops, wrong venue for that, try again.

At the beginning of January Dubs graduated from Nursery into Sunbeams.

Let's just say he is not pleased with this adjustment.

Let's face it, I would not be happy either. In Nursery you get goldfish and colored marshmallows. Plus you get to play with toys and friends for over an hour. In Sunbeams they make you sit it a chair, by girls no less. And they make you sing songs, how torturous can they get?

So the first week in Primary he figured out he could get out of sitting by going potty.

He had to go 5 times that day.

The Primary President talked to me so I talked to Dubs. We made sure he went potty before church and we told him he would be allowed to go only once during Primary, after that his teachers would tell him no. So this morning we talked about Primary again and reinforced the potty rule. He told me he wanted to go to Nursery and I told him he was too big for Nursery, that place is for babies and that he gets to go to Primary with his friend Cameron. He seemed Ok but I guess he was not. Within the first 5 minutes of church the Primary president brought him to Mr Bird. I was teaching in Relief Society and Mr Bird had to conduct in Elders Quorum because his counselor showed up late. So poor Mr Bird had Baby Cakes and Dubs while trying to conduct the meeting. After he got the meeting off and going he took Dubs in the hall for a talk. Dubs decided to go back to Primary and was fine the rest of the time. When we got home I asked Dubs what happened and he said,

"I got took by the CTR patrol."

Where do they come up with this stuff?

Oh, the cuteness is hurting my heart, I just can't take any more!

The Dress

Some of you have asked about the dress I wore in my last post.

I debated then weather I should mention the dress.

You all want to know where it came from and for what occasion it was originally intended.

Actually, and don't laugh, it's my favorite church dress.

I wear it when I teach in Relief Society.

It keeps all the old ladies from falling asleep.

Just kidding. Come on, you know you want one just like it.

Yes, it is very blue.

I call it electric blue.

It sorta hurts your eyes, blue.

You can't tell if you like it or not, blue.

OK, here's the scoop.

It was given to my by my sweet loving Sister-in-Law Lisa.

Her girls were in high school and going to proms every other week end.

Actually they were in home school high school but were being asked to every high school prom in town by all the high school boys because they are the most beautiful girls I know.

I seriously think my niece Jeni went to 3 or 4 proms in one year with that many different boys.

Anyhoo, Lisa loves shopping. She was in prom dress mode that year and found that one at Dillard's on clearance. She bought it, just in case.

One day when I was barely pregnant with Dubs we were at their house. Jeni had yet another prom to go to and was trying to decide which dress to wear. They pulled out all the dresses and we had a fun evening having a prom dress fashion show.

When I went home they sent the dress with me.

Her daughters never wore it.

I have never worn it out of the house.

When I got it home, the next week I had gained 5 pounds, which quickly turned into 20 more. The dress stayed in my closet during my whole pregnancy. I got it out a while after I had the baby but it still did not fit because I was nursing and, well, certain things were much, much larger. Now that all my babies are born and none are nursing anymore, it fits.

I just can't bring myself to put in on and walk out the door.

It's just so, so, so...

Blue. And shiny.

Doodle loves to play dress up and she insists that I play with her, since I have a very cool dress up dress.

Mr Bird loves it on me, for some strange reason.

I wore it one year for our Anniversary at home when I made a romantic dinner for two.

I love that dress because of all the fun things we've done at home with it, the Inaugural ball just makes me love it more.

Do you know what I think? I think you should all go get you prom dresses from high school and put them on and take a picture and post it on your blog.

I showed you the blue beast, now I want to see yours!!!

I triple dog dare you!

Inaugural Ball

Were You invited to the Inaugural Ball?

We were!

Not surprising considering I was the one that planned the whole thing.

I asked Mr Bird if he thought Barack Obama would make an appearance at our Inaugural Ball along with the 10 others he had to visit last night.
He said we might have a shot if we had donated a million dollars to his campaign or if our party were not over 2000 miles away.
Or maybe if we had even voted for him. As we watched this historic event we made our party decorations and baked a spectacular flag cake. The likes of which I have not seen since the 4th of July.
After dinner we all got dressed in our fanciest clothes and got ready to party.

We all had a great time dancing together. It was like we were at a real ball.
First the band (radio) played Vivaldi. We danced all fancy like.

Then we turned on real music and just went nuts.


Shoes were baned from our ball. You know that pesky no shoes allowed in the house rule.
That's OK, I don't like shoes much anyway. If it were not for the snow and the fact that it's socially unacceptable to go around barefoot I might never wear shoes.


Mr Bird and I only got to dance one song together. The kids pretty much demanded we dance with them all night long. When we did finally steal a dance we had to ignore the two screaming kids at our feet who were hanging onto our clothes.
Don't worry, we did not step on anyone.
As we watched the coverage on the news all morning of the Inauguration I could not help but feel how huge this moment was for America. They interviewed several black people who were part of the freedom writers back in the 60's. They were all so humbled and floored at how far our country has come. I was touched by how many people showed up to welcome our new president. Even though we may not agree on all political agendas, he is my president and I join in the millions of people all across the United States in welcoming him to the White house. As many others across the nation, I have high hopes for this guy. I hope he can see America through these tough times. I wanted to join in the parade and pomp and celebration. I wanted my kids to remember this time. We may not have another inauguration for 8 more years, by then I doubt they will want to have another ball in our living room. I felt I may as well do it now, when they're young and they don't know how weird I am yet. While they still want to dance with their mother.


Did we ever dance the night away. We danced until their little legs would not dance anymore.
We had a great time.
I hope our kids remember why we had this celebration.
As the years go on I want to teach them more about the presidency and just what that job entails. I want to teach them about the freedoms we enjoy and how we have the freedom to blast crazy music in our nice heated homes and dance like crazy people if we want because of the sacrifice so many have made for our nation.
I want to teach them of the men and women who have given their lives to make and keep our country free.
I want them to learn to work hard to keep these freedoms and to contribute to our country in some way, even if it's just by living a good life.
Happy Inauguration everyone!
If you did not get a chance to watch it on T.V. here is a link so you can watch it now!
Go ahead, it's history in the making.

Your Love is Better Than Chocolate

My computer has been sick the last week or so, hence the lack of blogging.

I could get on Mr Bird's computer and look, but all my pictures were stuck in mine.

Last night Mr Bird fixed my PC and now it works like a dream.

It's kind of handy to have a computer genius around sometimes.

Last week Mr Bird wanted to have a family jam for his Birthday. So we loaded up our kids and our cake and went to his sister Lisa's house where we ate cake and played music until way past bed time.
It was hard to eat that beautiful cake. I knew how much butter and sugar were in the thing, so it made it really hard to enjoy.
It is one of the richest most fattening and sinful cakes ever made.
I think each bite has 1,000 calories.

But boy, was it ever tasty.
Have I mentioned I love chocolate almost as much as I love my children?
But I still love Mr Bird more than chocolate, hands down.


Lisa has the most gorgeous music room with the most beautiful instruments.
A baby grand, a stand up bass, a harp, a Cello plus violins and guitars and a mandolin.
This makes their home ideal for family jams. Plus she and all her kids are the most talented musicians I know.
Lisa played the piano while Mr Bird played the bass.


Jeni, Jason (her cure hubby) and Jo all played the violin.
Jo also plays the harp and the piano.
Jeni plays piano and her hubby, Jason, sings. He has a gorgeous voice.


When we have jams I feel like we are attending a personal concert.
The kids sort of wonder in and out. They pick up an instrument here and there, then trade it for a different one, as they please.

Baby Cakes had to try each and every percussion instrument he could find.

He and Doodle had a great time trading and playing together.

They played a song called Lover's Waltz.

It is a beautiful song and always makes me think of Mr Birds mom and dad. One summer Sunday a few Summers ago we were having a family jam in Lisa's front yard.

All the people who could play an instrument were playing. I don't remember the song but suddenly dad took mom by the hand and lifted her up. This was just at the time when she was starting to get sick. He took her in his arms and danced with her, right there in the lawn. No one else was dancing. He just held her close and danced, he did not seem to care that we were all watching them. It is one of the most tender memories I have of the two of them. That is how their marriage was. Sure they had their rough spots, just like we all do, but there was no question how much love they had. And they were not afraid to show it to all of us. Coming from a single parent family, I don't think they knew how much that moment impacted me.

So when I hear Lover's Waltz I always have that image of the two of them dancing. In my mind I can see her dancing still. I dream about the time when Mr Bird and I are old and grey and sick and still dancing, no matter who is watching.

Cakes on Parade

Mr Bird's Birthday was a few days ago.

Happy Birthday, my love!

For the past few years he has wanted nothing but homemade tripe layer

German Chocolate cake.

It is rich and decadent and oh, so sinful.

I must admit, I like making the cake more than I like eating it.

After it was done I sat and starred at it for like 10 minutes.

It is so satisfying.

I made it totally from scratch, whipped egg whites folded into the batter and all.

And guess what?

It didn't fall!

It was perfect.

The only thing wrong was that the chocolate curls melted because the frosting was still slightly warm when I put them on.

It got me thinking about all the cakes I have made for our kids birthdays over the years.

I have had a ton of fun creating new creations year after year.

Here are some of them for your viewing pleasure.

This one is kind of tricky, it's a horse head. See the curly main?

I have made this race track a few times. The first time I made a circle 8 shape out of 2 round cakes. I could not find that photo though.

Then there's the pretty butterflies.

And the pink and purple girly froofy cake.

And the castle, complete with mote and draw bridge, one of my all time favorites.

Yet another bunny. My mom used to make these for Easter and since 2 of my kids were born in March it is an easy stand by when I'm out of ideas, or they don't have any requests.

The classic jelly bean cake.

Mr Bird even wanted cinnamon rolls one year. Your wish is my command.

And last but not least the cow cake.

There were others I could not find photos of, like the airplane, Beano's stand by and Dubs' choo choo train from his first Birthday. Those files are hiding somewhere.

I really enjoy cake making. Sometimes I think it would be fun to open a Bakery.

I could make breads, rolls, cookies, cakes, pastries and puffs to my little hearts content.

I would have a place to practice my creations so I could get really good at it. The only problem is who would school my children?

And I would probably gain like a million pounds.

Who can resist fresh baked peanut butter chocolate pinwheel cookies, I ask you.

I'll post that recipe soon, it's absolutely to die for.

So for now I will just keep dreaming of my very own cute little bakery in some cute little city.

Maybe someday!

To see what others are chatting about this Arctic Tuesday visit the Lazy Organizer.

Happy Tuesday!

The Heathens are Growing

Guess what happened to me today?

Actually, a whole lot of nothing.

I have not been feeling so hot all day long. I felt a little off last night but just thought I was super tired. I got up to workout this morning before the kids got up and about 3 minutes into it, I thought, "Ooo, I am really dizzy." I tried to push through it for a few more minutes then realized it was not going to happen today.

By the time the kids got up I felt like I was down for the count. I could have easily gone back to bed and slept for 5 more hours.

So I had Doodle pour bowls of cereal for all the kids while I slept on the Love Sac. Then a little later when they were ready for a snack she got the goldfish crackers out and shared with the boys. I put baby down for a nap and did a very watered down version of school. I had Doodle read a chapter from her book to me and then we watched Planet Earth and Reading Rainbow until lunch time while I slept on the Love Sac some more.

By lunch time I was feeling really bad. My body felt like it weighed 2 tons, I could barley lift my head. I was getting hungry by that time but I did not know if my system could handle much. The kids suggested we eat Ramen Noodles for lurch.

Now let's talk Ramen Noodles for a minute. The kids would eat them every day if they could get away with it. I on the other hand can't stand the nasty little buggers. They just seem like a whole lot of nothing.

Here is our lunch time conversation most days.

Me: "What do you guys want for lunch?

Trio of voices: "RAMEN NOODLES!!!"

Me: "No"

Them"Mac and Cheese"

Me:"No"

Them: "Sandwiches"

Me:"Ok"

You'd think I'd learn and just start with, "What kind of sandwich would you like for lunch today?" But I never do, maybe tomorrow.

Anyway, back to today. For some reason Ramen Noodles sounded good to me.

Just plain salty noodles.

The only problem was I was not moving from my spot on the Love Sac. So I thought about it for minute. Doodle has seen me make them, she even puts the noodles in the boiling water and stirs them up, she is always begging to help me in the kitchen. Then it hit me, I could make Doodle make lunch. I sat at a kitchen chair and watched and supervised as my first born made her first batch of Ramen Noodles all by herself.

She is getting so grown up. I did help her get them dished up into every one's bowls since they were piping hot. Doodle was so proud of herself.

After lunch Baby took his afternoon nap while I slept some more. The kids sat quietly and colored for over an hour, I really do have great kids.

I woke up a little while ago and I felt a little better.

I looked around the house and the day without a mother had really taken a toll on the house. I thought, Mr Bird is going to love this.

So I told Doodle and Beano that daddy was coming home soon and that they needed to clean up their messes.

To my complete shock and awe they actually did it...the first time I asked. Of course the house is not perfect, but the living areas are straightened and all the toys are put away. Doodle even washed the table and put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher. It helps that they are involved daily with cleaning the house, it's part of our afternoon routine. It does not always look very clean by the time Mr Bird gets home, but it gets done everyday.

Everyday I look at my kids with wonder and think how on earth can I stop the clock and make them stop growing so fast. But if they just keep getting more and more helpful, maybe I can handle the thought of them growing up,

just a little bit.

Right Before My Very Eyes

P.S. Please ignore my filthy child, I try to be perfect, but it does not always happen, sorry.

My baby is growing and changing right before my very eyes.

Somehow he looks the same every morning as he did when I put him to bed the night before.

So when has he done all this growing and changing?

Right before my very eyes.

I'm here all the time yet somehow I feel like I'm missing it.

I need to be able to do nothing but sit and play with him all day long, Like I did when Doodle was little. Now there are other silly distractions like 3 other kids, schooling that needs done, laundry and dishes for 6 people, 3 meals a day, you get the idea.

I just wish it could all slow down so I could sit and just stare at my baby. I want to memorize how he is right now, so even when he's grown I can still remember his cute grins and wavy hair and funny teeth.

Speaking of teeth he has molars.

Bring on the steak, baby!

His top 2 molars are half way through.

And guess what else? He is walking.

My baby walks.

Sort of.

He more lumbers around in the zombie stance than walks.

And so far his record is 13 steps without falling. He took his first official step on his Birthday.

It was the typical reach and step for the wanted item, then fall to the ground in a dazed and confused state, totally unaware of what he was doing. Once he stepped he tried to figure out what had just happened, what all the clapping and kissing and celebrating was for. He knew he had done it, but had no clue what it was or how to do it again.

A few days later he tried again.

Crash and burn.

Then Mr Bird and I stood him between us and sent him back and forth between the two of us. He thought that was the best game ever. He could still only eek out two steps though.

The next few days were filled with sheer determination. He knew he could do it and he was not afraid to try. We were playing in the basement and I saw him standing next to the couch and then purposely let go, turn and walk 3 steps all on his own. He did that twice that day. Now he does it all the time and can walk from one side of the basement room to the other all on his own. He loves it.

Doodle loves it.

She gets so excited to see her baby growing up.

Me? I just want to keep him a baby forever.

Ringing in the New Year!

What did you do for New Year's Eve?

Did you kiss your lover at midnight?

I did!

We had big plans for New Year's Eve.

We planned on painting our vacant rental house to get it ready for new tenants.

Yipee, Happy New Year's to me!

Mr Bird has been painting and fixing and tinkering for a week straight, he took the week between Christmas and New Year's off.

He spent more time working on that silly rental than he would have logged hours at work.

We knew he had to get it done before he had to work again on Friday so we got a sitter for the day time so we could get massive amounts of painting done. Then we planned to go home around 6 pm, spend the evening vegging in front of the T.V. and hoped to be in bed before 10pm.

Sounds exciting right?

Well, that's not how it turned out after all. As we were leaving to go to the rental our good friend Matt called and asked if we needed help painting.
Um, YES!
He was so great to come and help paint our silly walls. We got so much more done than we could have on our own. Thanks Matt!!!
As we painted we started talking about our New Year's plans and he said we should come over to play games. He said we'd ring in the New Year at 10pm (Midnight Eastern time) and we could still get home at a semi decent hour.


We played Cranium, boys against girls.
Who won you ask?
The girls of course! Was there really any question.
Actually, we creamed them.
It felt good, it felt really, really good!

Here is Matt's cute wife Kerilyn and her ever growing baby belly.

This is their 4th.

All of our children were being totally ignored while they played upstairs during our game.

They made quite the mess of the bedroom.

Sorry guys.

Kerilyn's parentals joined us for the evening as well, they are so fun and they love their cute grand kids so much.

As it turns out 10 pm came and went while we finished our game. We decided to wait until 11 to celebrate. Dubs stayed awake the whole time!

Doesn't he look chipper?

Like a deer caught in the headlights!

Baby Cakes was not quite so alert. He knocked out around 10:30. That's pretty good for him, he's used to being in bed by 8 pm, every night, without fail.

We all drank our cider and said what we were going to resolve to do, I will write another post about that later. I will say that one of my resolutions had to do with more patience.

That resolution was tested almost immediately. We left for home around 11:20 and got home right around midnight. We rushed the kids off to bed and crashed in our own.

A few short hours later I could hear Dubs trying to unzip his footy jammies and crying in frustration. I got up to help him unzip and get on the potty.

As soon as I got his jammies off and his unders down it was too late, he could not hold it any longer. His poor little bladder just could not wait the 2 more seconds it would have taken to get on the potty and he proceeded to pee all over ME! Not on the floor or the bath mat.

He peed on me.

At 2 am.

Why do these things always happen at 2 am?

If being peed on within the first few hours of a New Year is considered good luck, I have a feeling it's going to be a very, very good year.

Have You Ever?

This is my 100th post!!!

Yipee for me.

In celebration of such a big mile stone I will share a post I was inspired to write by one of the blogs that I blog stalk.

Yes, I blog stalk, but only the really funny ones.

Honestly, there's only like 3 that I think are so funny that I just can't get enough.

So one of them is Stephanie, a cute and very in shape mom of 2 little girls.

You know that list that is going around the blogosphere where you're supposed to bold the things on the list that you've done? Well, she came up with a list of 100 cool mom things. I read her list and laughed so hard. I thought about sharing her list here, but almost every single item on her list would be in bold. So as I was drifting off to sleep that night my very own list started to form in my head.

And here it is for all of you to look at and laugh at.

So I ask you, Have you ever...

1. Found love notes from your kids on your pillow.

2. Looked out the kitchen window only to find your kids chasing each other with really long sticks.

3. Thought the sound of your baby humming himself to sleep was way better than the most beautiful sonnet ever written.

4. Saved your little girl's beautiful hair by using peanut butter to get the gum out instead of just whacking it off.

5. Found your little girl with a chunk of hair missing all the way to the scalp and the scissors you could have swore you put away in her chubby little hands.

6. Cried with your hungry newborn knowing the pain that will accompany feeding those tiny little suckers. OUCH!

7. Nursed all those sweet babies anyway because you know nothing on earth could be better for them.

8. Worried your first born would drown in the toilet and the cause of her death would appear on the front page of every news paper in the nation.

9. Vacuumed the floor 4 times in one day.

10. Had a whole container of fruit loops fly out of said container and land in the hair of the people sitting in front of you in church.

11. Felt guilty for feeding your kids fruit loops for any meal and or snack.

12. Needed a vacation from your heathens.

13. Missed your heathens while you were gone.

14. Been "that" mother in the grocery store with a child screaming at the top of his lungs.

15. Ignored said child and continued to shop like nothing unusual was happening.

16. Been ecstatic beyond measure when you found out you were expecting.

17. Been a little less than ecstatic at the timing of one or more of your subsequent pregnancies.

18. Found out you love those little mistakes just as much as the planned ones.

19. Looked around you and wondered where on earth all these people came from.

20. Climbed a mountain with your kids in tow.

21. Put the kids to bed 1/2 hour early because you just can't take anymore.

22. Spent the first 48 hours of your child's life not able to sleep a wink, afraid he/she will stop breathing if you stop watching him/her for even a moment.

23. Painted a bedroom pink.

24. Built sand castles with your kids.

25. Ate your kids Halloween candy after they have gone to bed.

26. Paid a baby sitter with a 12 pack of Coke or a pound of See's Candy.

27. Watched with bated breath as your sweet baby toddles out his/her first steps, then grabbed him/her to celebrate with a million kisses on those ever so squishy cheeks.

28. Been so over whelmed with the thought of finding 4 coats and 4 pairs of socks and 4 pairs of shoes that you decided to just stay home instead.

29. Thought your kids were smarter and cuter than all of their peers.

30. Awoke your kids when you got home from date night because you needed a good night kiss.

31. Prayed for strength to finish a day.

32. Read a story without pictures to your kids and have them beg you not to stop, just one more chapter.

33. Begged and pleaded with a child to stop peeing/pooping in his or her pants.

34. Begged and pleaded with a child to stop eating his/her boogers.

35. Turned the music on really loud and sang and danced like a crazy person with your kids.

36. Made about 100 paper airplanes in one day.

37. Looked at your kids and wondered when they did all that growing and wondered how on earth that ever came out of you.

38. Thanked Heavenly Father for giving you 4 of the best kids on earth.

39. Washed countless puke blankets in the middle of the night.

40. Upgraded a child to a booster seat because it was easier than cleaning puke out of the car seat.

41. Wanted to puke while cleaning up puke.

42. Made a kid eat dinner even though they said they were not hungry only to have them puke up all of said dinner at 2 am.

43. Puked because of morning sickness.

44. Laughed when your 3 year old yells from the bathroom, "there's puke coming out of my bum!" knowing that's not puke...

45. Thought of how much easier life would be if you could just leave and go to work every day.

46. Loved the rainy days when you snuggle with the kids in a big blanket on the couch with a good book and yummy snacks, and not wanted to be anywhere else on earth.

47. Stepped on a Lego or a Hot Wheel in the middle of the night and held back that yelp of pain because you did not want to wake up the kids.

48. Noticed in Sacrament meeting that your 3 year old girl left her under ware at home in front of the toilet.

49. Felt like a failure at this mom stuff.

50. Had a baby blow out at church.

51. Had a baby spew 1/2 of the milk that he just ate all down your top at church.

52. Had spit up land in your mouth.

53. Found your 2 year old with your mascara painted on her face from her eye brows to her chin.

54. Took a picture of said mess rather than yell at her.

55. Learned to keep your make up bag out of reach of children.

56. Called poison control, 3 times in one week.

57. Chose to have natural child birth.

58. Chose to have natural child birth again.

59. Thought you caught a glimpse of eternity just for a moment as you stared into the deep blue eyes of your newborn.

60. Spent hours and hours just watching your baby sleep.

61. Wondered why no one ever told you how hard it is to be the mom.

62. Realized you would not have understood what they were talking about, you have to feel it to know it.

63. Thanked the makers of Huggies when you know that with any other diaper that would have been a blow out.

64. Stopped eating dairy because you thought your newborn was allergic to milk only to find out 5 months later that all breast fed babies have runny poo.

65. Cursed the universe for all the months of going without ice cream for no reason.

66. Laughed at the imaginary games your kids come up with all by themselves.

67. Sang millions of kid songs while driving if for no other reason than to keep the heathens from fighting in the car.

68. Realized real life is way funnier than the best comedy ever written.

69. Had the thought that you'd rather pull your fingernails out one at a time than have to endure yet another day of potty training.

70. Taken your kids home early from sacrament meeting because they were being so unbelievably naughty.

71. Continued said sacrament meeting at home on the couch so the kids can practice being reverent where you can yell at them if they mess up.

72. Been sprayed with urine as your boy child is exiting your uterus.

73. Opened Christmas presents before 5 am.

74. Heard your child read his/her first word.

75. Heard your child read his/her first chapter.

76.Had you child tell you on the way home from church that he got mad at his primary teacher (who just happens to be the Stake President's wife) and so he spit on her.

77. Marched your son over to said teachers house so he could apologize.

78. Used the T.V. as a babysitter while you showered or made dinner.

79. Realized none of the other moms on the block are perfect either.

80. Been scared to clip you babies fingernails for fear of clipping his skin too.

81. Realized you turn into a raging maniac person with anything less than 5 hours of sleep.

82. Snuck a snack in your bedroom that you did not want to share with your kids.

83. Had all 4 kids pile in your bed on a Saturday morning.

84. Had to call Roto Rooter after a toy was purposely flushed by your curious 3 year old.

85. Realized your kids are not the only naughty ones, that all 3 year olds are created equal.

86. Had your child steel a piece of candy from a drug store.

87. Marched said child right back in to give it back and apologize.

88. Thanked Heavens when the store clerk spoke to your child sternly instead of just laughing it off.

89. Wanted to die of embarrassment as your child ate her boogers in front of the entire church congregation.

90. Cried yourself to sleep thinking about potty training yet another child.

91. Found out you are not as patient a person as you had once thought.

92. Prayed every day for more patience.

93. Traveled in a car for more than 8 hours with 4 kids and found you still loved all of them when you got to your destination.

94. Dug 4 Hungry, Hungry Hippo marbles out of your 1 year old's mouth at one time .

95. Played hide and seek in the house with your kids.

96. Made up your own bed time story.

97. Looked down at your bosom after weaning your 4th child and wondered how on earth something so small could be so saggy.

98. Been sprayed in the face with baby food as your baby sneezes with a big mouth full.

99. Bribed your kids with candy or cookies or money.

100. Found out bribing works miracles.

Happy 100 to me!!!