Wednesday, November 19, 2008

I Saved the Best for Last

Before I begin I need to make a confession. I am a horrible mother.
I admit it.
I am not proud of it.
I try every day to be better, I really do.
But when things like this happen I just can't help myself.
Just don't judge me.
OK, I can start my story now.
While we were at Disneyland we took the kids on a ride called Honey I Shrunk the Audience.
This is one of those rides where you sit in a big auditorium and the chairs are on hydraulics and it is in 3D. It starts out really cool with things flying around the screen. Somewhere near the middle a cat face shows up on the screen and slowly morphs into a lion's head and a big set of claws seem to swoop out of the screen right at the audience. Our kids flipped out. They had never seen anything in 3D before and it was too much to take. Beano closed his eyes and was in the fetal position in his chair with his head between his legs crying for his life. Dubs was transfixed and could not stop watching even though he was screaming in sheer terror for the remainder of the show. Doodle was on daddy's lap clinging to him as if her life depended on it. Baby Cakes was freaked out by their reactions and was just as horrified. Soon that part was over and we got them all under control except Dubs, he never did stop crying. A little later in the show a huge snake appears in 3D and opens it's mouth wide and seems to strike at the audience.
That was it.
Our kids were done for.
All four of them were literally hysterical.
Their little lives were over, they thought they were goners.
They would not calm down until the show was over and we were out of the theatre.
It took a while for them to gain our trust again. They did not want to ride anymore rides because they were afraid it was going to be too scary.
Here is where the bad parenting comes in. As my poor babies are scared out of their gourdes for their very lives Mr Bird and I sat in our chairs laughing hysterically.
A good mother would take her frightened child out of that scary place. She would stroke their heads lovingly telling them in soft words that it would all be OK. She would apologize profusely for taking them there in the first place. She would buy them an ice cream cone to make every thing all better.
But not me, All I could do was laugh, hard and long and loud.
Our only worry was laughing so loud we might disturb the people near us.
Terrible, I know.
Just don't judge me.
I couldn't help myself.


Julie said...

I must be a bad mother too, because I tend to laugh when my kids are in hysterics over stuff like this too!

Shannon said...

Wow! I'm just catching up on all your posts. I am so jealous! We were in Disneyland last year at the exact same time and it is amazing at Christmas. I think I cried when I saw the castle lit up at night. Our kids flipped out in the Bugs Life 4d movie. Did you see that one? Good for you for doing something so spontaneous. That makes so much more memorable!

Mina said...

But good mothers have boring blogs!

Controlling My Chaos said...

Isn't Disney great? I'm so sorry we missed that one. It sounds like a hoot.