I love Cream Cheese.
There, I said it.
Actually what I should have said was, "Hello, my name is Sara and I'm a Cream Cheese-aholic."
Right under chocolate, there are few guilty pleasures I enjoy more.
Now, you may be thinking, there's nothing wrong with a little cream cheese every once in a while and you'd be right.
The problem is this: when I buy cream cheese, I don't eat just a little smear on my bagel.
As a matter of fact I don't buy it very often because I just can't be trusted when it's in the house.
I will find anything to dip in it or to smear it on top of.
Stale box of crackers no one will touch?
Cream cheese makes it all better.
The key is to load the cracker up with so much cream cheese you can hardly tell the cracker is even there.
The cracker becomes more of a texture ingredient rather than a taste good ingredient.
I have been know to buy cream cheese and not share a smidgen with anyone.
I hide it in the back of the fridge behind the broccoli and sneak it out while the kids are playing outside or after bed time.
Even then, it usually does not last more than 3 days, sometimes less. Much less.
If I could get a way with it, I'd just skip the whole finding something to put it on and just bring the entire brick to my office and pig out while I blog for hours, totally ignoring my children.
It's my drug of choice.
One of these days I'm going to wake up weighing 500 pounds.
I know you just love it when I speak to inanimate objects like they can actually hear me, so here I go again. Just for you.
Dear Cream Cheese, It was so good to see you again, but we have to stop meeting like this. I'm sorry to end it this way, but I just can't have you in my life right now. You'll always be in my heart and I'll never forget Liberty.
P.S. It's not you, it's me :(